Monday, September 22, 2008

Possible Replacement OCs

As if its not already obvious from our first three games of the season, time has come for a new offensive coordinator. we bastards have come up with a list of potential replacements. Feel free to contribute your ideas in the comments:

1. Ask Corso - NCAA 07
Pros: Fewer bubble screens. Continuation of lack of coherent offensive scheme, which we apparently like.

Cons: It's Corso (sort of).

2. Magic Eight Ball.
Pros: Its magic!

Cons: Burn through timeouts when answer is: "Check back later."

3. Any waitress from Keglers.
Pros: Kinda hot. Nice shorts. Great recruiter.

Cons: Crabs.

4. Charley Taafe
Pros: Available. He was our original first choice for OC.

Cons: Couldn't hack it in the CFL.

5. Lump of coal.
Pros: From West Virginia

Cons: Who cares? Its from West Virginia (see Bill Stewart).

6. 20 sided die:
Pros: Randomness. Unpredictable.

Cons: 18 too many sides.

7. Prayer
Pros: Its the Christian thing to do. God.

Cons: Similarity to current scheme.

Please share your ideas in the comments.

8 comments:

dyer said...

8. Phone A Friend.
Pros: Expert advice from successful OCs around the NCAA.

Cons: Only one call per half. Accidentally dialing Jimbo Fisher.

Option Spread said...

A few that missed the cut:

9. The Large Hadron Collider
Pros: Potential to accelerate PW and Noel to near light speed.

Cons: Miniature black holes.

10. A flag with "Run Patrick Run" written in Sharpee.
Pros: Approx. cost of $5.

Cons: Similarity to current scheme.

Anonymous said...

11. Run NCAA '08 video game, taking side of opponent, run whatever play computer picks for WVU.

Pros: variety of plays, actual planning

Cons: Computer keeps putting in Owen Schmitt


Welcome back, BSPM! Is option spread the same guy with a new job?

- Mike from Fairfax

Brave Sir Robin said...

For the record, the ladies of Keglers would be great recruiters. Further, MOST of those ladies don't have crabs. I figure there is always the outside chance, but wouldn't that require there to be some carpet to go with the drapes?

Sadly, OS is still the same guy. He does have a different job. Sadly, now his office shares a common wall with my own. What was I thinking?

FYI- I got my basketball season ticket renewal info in the mail this week. If you haven't seen the new scoreboard hanging in the Coliseum- you should. badass.

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britney said...

nice post..
___________________
Britney
Entertainment at one stop