Everyone point and laugh

For the past 5 years Marshall University has been attempting to raise money for an indoor practice facility. Unfortunately when you can't sell out a 30,000 seat stadium, don't have a library with "books", and have to take the a plane across country with the chickens in the back (like those 80's movies) you aren't going to raise the money for the IPF. Well offseason conditioning is upon us and Marshall is trying to make the best of it with what little resources they have. Chuck Landon is the Marshall mouthpiece and #1 cheerleader forever. He has an artcle about the workouts in the makeshift practice rooms. Landon, of course, tries to make it sound like an experience that will bring the team together and build chemistry. However, when I read this article it is hard not to imagine what is really happening. It appears the equipment consists of the following from the Island of Misfit Workout equipment:

1. Two hula-hoops, one with beads still inside.
2. 1 bent bar for adding weights and bench with 30 pounds of duct tape over the seams.
3. Sand weights with one 30 pound, 2 five pound, and a 15 pound weight available.
4. 1 bead, two rope jump ropes.
5. Two broken ice cube treys
6. VCR and 18" black and white t.v.
7. 8 track player with some Foghat and Grand Funk Railroad (Snyder likes to party).
8. Stationary bike missing pedals and treadmill that only runs backwards.
9. Four stolen road cones.
10. Ab-roller (brand new/never used) and one deflated football w/o a pump.

The equipment leads to the following type of workout for Marshall's players:

Get up at 6 and show up to the "practice facility" (McDonald's parking lot).
Set up cones try to run around them, get bored try to drive around them.
Run some sprints, stop because exhaust from Drive-Thru is making everyone sick.
Move to a Marshall Classroom.
Move desks to hallway, at least one back injury during move, everyone else tires so nappy time.
Have push-up contest, first one to get to 10 will be the first ever.
Individual work-out session time; break into four groups of juggling, fingerpainting, napping, and eating glue.
Everyone roll down a big hill together (builds up team chemistry).
Talk about why WVU is evil and how much you hate, hate, hate them.
Call Mom and have her pick you up and take you for ice cream

Sometimes you almost feel bad for them. Then you remember Bob Pruett and laugh.