An entire nation can rest easy tonight as Chris Henry did not break probation since he did not fail a Kentucky court ordered drug test. Therefore Henry will not be going to jail as previously reported by the entire free world, although knowing Henry there are many other things he could go to jail for by nightfall if he plays his cards right. Only time will tell if the Bengals suspend Henry for failing to get arrested. In related news Chris Henry has also been cleared of previous suspicion for involvement in both the Lincoln and Kennedy assassinations, the Lufthansa heist, Enron, and OJ is pretty sure Henry didn't kill Nicole. Pacman is very disappointed, but relieved. To up the stakes in the ever escalating competition, Pac was going to set fire to a preschool. A preschool filled with puppies and kittens.